No One's Perfect, Not Even You

I'm a little sad today... just heard about a couple I know separating. The really sad thing is that this marriage is barely past the honeymoon stage, and the even sadder thing is that there are kids involved who have already been through one divorce. Seems that we're all surrounded by broken homes today. I remember when I was a kid and I was the only one in my class with a single parent. When my son started school 12 years ago, he was one of the only kids whose parents were still married. Times have changed so much.

Sometimes it even reaches a level of craziness when teenagers start dating, then their parents start dating each other and the former dates become some blend of stepkids... oooo there's a strange world!

The thing that gets me is how many times I see people basically marry the same person over and over again, making the same mistakes time and again. Why not stay with the first one and cut out all the work of finding someone else only to have them turn out to have the same problems? No one's perfect, so you're not going to find the perfect man out there. Especially on the rebound.

Which leads to the second part of this. I don't care how bad your spouse was, you made some mistakes too. Own it. Until you do, you're going to make the same mistakes you 'didn't' make over and over and you're going to continue to be miserable and make everyone around you miserable and then people are going to start avoiding you because you're delusional and bitter. No one's perfect, remember? Not even you, so quit pretending. The only one you're fooling is yourself.

For the most part the thing I'm seeing is that everyone's more worried about hopping in the sack than they are in making sure that they can get along for the 23 hours a day that they're not having sex...keep in mind that if you don't get along and don't have the same principles and worldview, sooner or later you're not going to be having sex anyway. Kisses don't make it all better, talking your problems through respectfully does. Even though you all live in the same house now you still have to be as nice to each other as you were before... maybe nicer. And remember, just because you feel right doesn't mean you are right. Sometimes there is no solution to an argument, so you have to learn to agree to disagree. Be NICE. Remember, there's no I in team, and that's what a good marriage needs: Teamwork... dang... now I know I've been watching too much ESPN. I'm speaking in 'coach'...